

It is the story of twin brothers, who grow into opposing clichés - a superhero and a villain. It is the story of Surya’s irrepressible grandfather, always in his corner. It is a story of The Girl, fearless and determined while refreshingly unsure about how smart she is and what she can make of herself. Surya’s story could be a standard-issue revenge saga, but it isn’t just the story of one boy prone to dehydration. His grandfather, in an attempt to let him fit in, teaches him when to pretend and say “Ouch,” but this girl - The Girl who doesn’t say ouch - makes our hero forget his cue.

Raised on a Bruce Lee-and-water diet, Surya grew up hearing himself described as a “medical miracle” by doctors surprised by his rare condition, a congenital insensitivity to pain (Surya, haphazard narrator of his own film, advises us to Google this later). Vasan Bala’s Mard Ko Dard Nahi Hota is an ode to joy. We frequently use the word ‘nakhra’ for airs rather than girls flying through the air, but a nakhra is also a skill, an art, an elaborate power-move hidden up one’s sleeve. Making sure to first tie back her hair, The Girl slides across the front of a car in a white dress, while lassoing a goon with her dupatta - all as the 1956 song Nakhrewaali plays on a nearby radio. Finally, we have a Hindi action film with set-pieces and fight-scenes well worth rewinding. This man deserves to be controlling a franchise. Bala is a distinctive filmmaker with immediately identifiable style, and if I were Hrithik Roshan, I’d be calling him up right now to give him the reins to my superhero character. That analogy goes deeper than love for screen silliness, mind you, since Bala’s comedy is also a precisely choreographed one.
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Mard Ko Dard Nahi Hota is the movie Farah Khan would have made if she had a thing for Bruce Lee. It is an action film, about fights and villains and the importance of pain, and Bala serves up chopsocky goodness not only with directorial flair, but with the benevolence of a friendly neighbourhood ‘Chinese-van’ cook, drowning chowmein in soya sauce and vinegar. Vasan Bala’s Mard Ko Dard Nahi Hota is an ode to joy, a celebration of the cassette-tapes its maker has been brought up on. Those who love the movies also love when movie clichés line up just right. Something worth pausing and rewinding and cueing up and watching again. These scratches of overuse indicated something seen so often it had literally been rendered unwatchable, but also something beloved. Thirty years ago, the job given to me whenever the family would rent a VHS cassette would be to “check the print.” The tapes inside would get worn out after multiple playback in multiple players, and eagerly anticipated screenings would go wrong if the quality wasn’t - behold the pun - up to scratch. Cast: Abhimanyu Dassani, Radhika Madan, Gulshan Devaiah
